I totally got called out last week for not posting the third and final installment of this series I started back in May.
There's really only one honest answer, and I'll give it to you:
Going back and hashing through all of that information I shared with you in Part 1 and Part 2 was really emotionally draining for me! It was kinda like I had a little counseling session with myself and I needed some time to step away from the topic.
But, now I've had a month to think about it and re-energize myself to write the post, so here goes!
I want to be perfectly clear, too, that this post in no way is saying that I think the "traditional" church is better than other churches. Not in any way. I have just found that this is where we were led and that now I see why God led us to this place.
I have gone back and forth about how to approach this topic and while I could give you a list of all the particular things I love about the traditional church, that's not the way I want to go. I have realized that changing church "styles" was more about finding myself than finding a church. I have learned so much about myself in the past few years that it is pretty painful to think about! Lots of stretching & growing over the past decade! I am not the same person I was at 19 or 20 and coming to terms with who I am as an adult is really what solidified our decision to move. So, instead of giving you a run-down of what I like about the traditional church, I'm going to give you a list of what I have learned about myself and how the church we call "home" has fit those needs.
1. I thrive on structure.
This is not a secret. I like routine, organization, planning, structure. I just do. I can't help it. I have learned over the years (especially after having a little one!) to be flexible. But, at the end of the day, I need structure. Many of the churches I attended in the past struggled with structure and organization mostly because they were new. They were still getting started out and trying to find what worked best for their congregation. For me, it was too much change too often.
2. I need accountability.
This is a slightly touchy subject, but in my experience, non-traditional churches are a little more "open minded" and "grace filled" and not as apt to call you out on your sin. I'm very grateful to attend a church where our pastor isn't afraid to "go there" and where my friends are willing to step up and question me when I might be making an unwise decision. Discipline is often something we shy away from, but it is an aspect of God's character and His love for us that must not be overlooked.
3. I love tradition.
I just do. Call me old-fashioned, call me sentimental. It's not the traditions themselves, it's the symbolism and purpose behind them. For instance, hymns are "traditions" to me. When we sing some of the older hymns (without changing them up to make them sound "modern"), I feel connected to a body of Christ larger than the one I'm currently singing with. I'm reminded of the generations of people who sang those songs before me, worshipping God to the same tune and words as I am in 2014. I just love that.
4. I am conservative.
I am a compassionate conservative, but I am still very much morally conservative. (I'm not talking about politics, here. You should all know me better than that!) I have very "straight-laced" values and beliefs and I want to attend a church that is willing to stand up for Biblical principles. I do think we need to continually work on standing up for the Bible with grace, but we're all working on it.
5. I like a big church.
I have been a member of churches of all sizes. From tiny twelve-member country churches to a mega-church. I've experienced it all. And what I find is that I really prefer a larger church. Not as large as a mega-church (with multiple campuses), but I like a church that is large enough to have the resources and people to help make the church run smoothly week in and week out. In some of the smaller churches, I ended up feeling burned out because I like to be an active member of the church and I felt obligated to "fill a need" anytime it was needed. In the mega-church, I often didn't feel needed because there were just so many people. At our current church, I am able to be involved in several different ministries, but I don't feel pressured to be a part of every single thing that's going on. But I do occasionally get calls to help fill in when we are short-handed, and I am usually happy to help! Being an involved member of your church is imperative - if you aren't serving, why not!? And you know... when you start to serve in your church and get involved, it doesn't seem so big anymore!
6. I enjoy being around people of all ages and stages.
Some of the non-traditional churches I attended were made up of one large demographic: young families. And while that's all well and good, I really see the value in attending a multi-generational church. We have a lot to learn from our elders and from those who are in different stages than us. Becoming a mother and embracing my new role in life was made simpler by the wisdom of those who had been through it before.
7. I like to sing.
Surprise, surprise! While I led worship at a few different churches for many years, I honestly really prefer to be in a choir. I enjoy singing lead, but I am more comfortable singing harmony. It's just where I fit! The style music is not a big deal for me. I worship God just the same no matter if we are singing a song from the 1970's or from 2014. (Also, "Shout to the Lord" will never go out of style in my book. I just HAD to mention it.)
That's about it! I could go on, but I'll stop there. :)
What I've learned from the years is that there is truly no perfect church. No one church has it ALL together. They may be good at particular aspects or have a certain mission they pursue, but there are gaps everywhere in every church because they're comprised of sinful humans. And, trust me, I know that people think the "traditional church" is full of stuffy Republican "Sunday Christians". What I can tell you is that, yes, that's true. There are those people. But there are even more who I think are genuinely seeking to honor Christ with their lives. False Christians are everywhere - in every church, in every denomination.
If you are not an active member of a church, I urge you to find a church home ASAP! Don't be afraid to branch out of your comfort zone. Hello - I went to VERY non-traditional churches for over ten years and swore I would never be a Baptist! But that is what I wanted for my life. I feel like I have finally heeded God's calling to me to return to the traditional church and I'm so grateful I did. You will be too once you find where God is calling you. Keep looking, keep searching, keep praying for your own church home!
Tuesday, July 8, 2014
Wednesday, June 25, 2014
17 Months
So it's been a few months since I updated you on the life of Maleah Ball. Let me just tell you, she is an almost-17-month-old DRAMA QUEEN. She is sweet and kissy and snuggly one minute and then SCREAMING AT THE TOP OF HER LUNGS angry the next. But, that's pretty much all toddlers, from what I understand!
Basically, she is a typical little 17-month-old girl. She talks, she walks, she runs, she plays, she cries, she throws fits, she tries new things, she rejects new situations, she runs like clockwork, she surprises us, she makes us laugh, she makes us want to pull out our hair... you get the idea.
I love this age/stage she's in, but it's also an exhausting phase of her life for me and Blake. She understands so much but her ability to communicate is so limited, so trying to figure out what she wants and teach her how to say/sign new words is quite a task! But it's so fun to see her "get it" and catch on to things that we've been working on for days or weeks. Recently, I've noticed she really understands a lot of what we are saying - or she will at least try to figure it out. She can follow simple directions and she can answer "yes" or "no" to questions. I am constantly amazed at what she's able to do! A few words we've taught her that have been immensely helfpul lately are "help" and "gentle". I'll let you guess why! :)
My favorite part about this age is that she loves to help me do things! It's so cute. She loves to help with the laundry, unload the dishes, water the flowers, make the bed... and, of course, she loves to sit with me as I get ready in the morning. She loves to pick out her clothes and put on her shoes - and boy, does she have opinions on what she is wearing!!! She loves have her hair brushed and to get her toenails painted! I am really trying to convince her to wear hair bows again. The past several days she has worn one and left it in! Yay! :)
One thing we are really working on this month is discipline. Blake's great at being authoritative and I pretty much stink at it. I can always find an excuse for why she's behaving a certain way and how unfair it would be to punish her for it. But I'm learning that she needs boundaries, even when she has a valid reason for being cranky/upset/bored. We have started putting her in time out (in her crib for 90 seconds to 2 minutes) when she is being particularly "bad". It has worked beautifully a few times now! I also realized that I have been threatening punishment without following through. I really didn't think it mattered until I realized that she totally knew what I was doing. Now that I have actually followed through with some of my discipline threats, I can see a change in her reaction when I tell her do/stop doing . Now my "threats" (I hate using that word!) are more meaningful because she knows I am serious. Several times, she has been caught misbehaving and I have asked, "Do you need to go to time out?" and she will immediately stop doing whatever it is she wasn't supposed to do. She has been MUCH happier since I've put my foot down a little more. I guess kids really do need and want discipline and boundaries from their parents!
Lastly, her appetite has really changed lately! She is way more open to different foods than right now. She can chew a lot better now that she has two back molars (one of top of another so she can really chomp down!). She has taken a liking to corn, cucumbers, and even radishes! We also found that she likes those Chef Boyardee microwaveable spaghettis/mac & cheese... so... I won't lie, sometimes I let her eat them for a meal (with a side of vegetables or fruit!). She does not seem to like much whole fruit - she will eat it at school, but not at home. I don't know why! But we have learned to just be relaxed about and to continue letting her try foods, even if she didn't like it the time before. Sometimes that means wasted food, but it's all a part of the process! Avocado, by the way, is still her favorite food.
As for me, motherhood is really growing on me! I won't lie, this has been a hard 17 months. Becoming a mom/parent is a huge challenge. Not only do you have to take care of a tiny person, but you basically have to become a new version of yourself. I think I'm starting to really settle in to the new "me" - different expectations, different priorities, different outlooks, different perspectives. It really is a lifechanging experience to become a mom. I'm so glad I get to be a mom to my sweet little girl. I just love her so much!
Basically, she is a typical little 17-month-old girl. She talks, she walks, she runs, she plays, she cries, she throws fits, she tries new things, she rejects new situations, she runs like clockwork, she surprises us, she makes us laugh, she makes us want to pull out our hair... you get the idea.
At the zoo in late May! She had a great time!
Poor kid was so sick in April & May. This was when she tested positive for strep. Ick!
Her "Oh no!" face!
I love this age/stage she's in, but it's also an exhausting phase of her life for me and Blake. She understands so much but her ability to communicate is so limited, so trying to figure out what she wants and teach her how to say/sign new words is quite a task! But it's so fun to see her "get it" and catch on to things that we've been working on for days or weeks. Recently, I've noticed she really understands a lot of what we are saying - or she will at least try to figure it out. She can follow simple directions and she can answer "yes" or "no" to questions. I am constantly amazed at what she's able to do! A few words we've taught her that have been immensely helfpul lately are "help" and "gentle". I'll let you guess why! :)
My favorite part about this age is that she loves to help me do things! It's so cute. She loves to help with the laundry, unload the dishes, water the flowers, make the bed... and, of course, she loves to sit with me as I get ready in the morning. She loves to pick out her clothes and put on her shoes - and boy, does she have opinions on what she is wearing!!! She loves have her hair brushed and to get her toenails painted! I am really trying to convince her to wear hair bows again. The past several days she has worn one and left it in! Yay! :)
Playing in the yard!
Walking the pier with her daddy. We had a great time at the beach this year! Maleah wasn't too keen on the sand and ocean, but she liked to walk the shore and find sea shells! She also just loved being around her family (we went with Blake's parents and siblings) for eight whole days!
As for me, motherhood is really growing on me! I won't lie, this has been a hard 17 months. Becoming a mom/parent is a huge challenge. Not only do you have to take care of a tiny person, but you basically have to become a new version of yourself. I think I'm starting to really settle in to the new "me" - different expectations, different priorities, different outlooks, different perspectives. It really is a lifechanging experience to become a mom. I'm so glad I get to be a mom to my sweet little girl. I just love her so much!
Maleah on June 22 of last year! Just 5 little months old!
Tuesday, May 13, 2014
Why I Returned to the Traditional Church: Part 2
I really, really, really tried to get this out on Friday but... as you recall from Part 1, life happens! And I really didn't know I had so many demanding readers.... Amber Compton... ;)
My last post left off with me being brokenhearted in Montevallo. A two and a half year relationship was permanently over and I was two hours away from my mama.
What was I going to do? How in the world was I going to start over? Who could I turn to?
Chris and Kaley, that's who! They were still engaged and about to graduate from UM and get married. And they were there for me. That's why I love 'em! The three of us (and Matt Walker) hung out a lot that spring. And in May when the dorms closed, Kaley and I became ROOMIES again! FUN FUN FUN! That was one of the best summers. There was after-work Seinfeld watching, Tetris tournaments, lots of oldies music, and boo-hooing over Kaley's impending marriage (which meant I couldn't be her roomie anymore!). OH and did I mention I ACED Physics and Pre-Cal that summer!? Whoop whoop! (When else am I supposed to brag about that!?)
During that spring and summer, I went to Shelby Crossings some, but mostly I went home on the weekends. I loved spending time at my mom's new house. I would sit on the back porch on Saturday mornings, staring out into the pasture and just think about how much I actually liked being there. My ENTIRE LIFE, all I wanted to do was GET THE HECK OUT OF TUSCALOOSA COUNTY. But that summer, particularly, I felt myself drawn more and more to home.
Kaley & Chris got married on August 16, 2008. On the 17th, I had friends over to my mom's house in Ralph for my birthday (which is the 18th). I will never forget this conversation, which shaped the rest of my life. I was telling my friends about how miserable I was at Montevallo and how I just wanted to come home. This is what I will never forget - Matty Matt, my fake big bro, said - "There's no rule that says you have to stay in Montevallo. Just move home."
[IMAGINE A TRAIN COMING TO A SCREECHING HALT.]
Everybody agreed. They all encouraged me to just move home.
So, and I kid you not, I did. I literally moved home that week. I quit my job. I packed my stuff. I withdrew from UM, registered for classes at Shelton (it was too late to register at UA), and I moved home.
For a little while, I went to Hargrove with my mom but I didn't want it to be my home church. So I did what any 20-something would do, I asked Facebook where I should go to church. Ashley Martin (who I'd met in my first round at Shelton) invited me to Vineyard. I went one Sunday and was hooked.
It was, yet again, a non-traditional church. Casual meetings. Worship band. Hysterically funny (and gifted) pastors. A church meant for those who were fed up with religion. Now, this is where things start to get hard for me to talk about because leaving Vineyard was not a decision we entered into lightly. I have never been as invested in a church as I was in Vineyard and leaving was one of the hardest decisions I have ever made. I still love our pastors and my time there and attribute so much of my spiritual growth to the three years I spent there. I have never been in a church that is so focused on living out the Gospel day in and day out. But, this is the church we left to go to First Baptist. It was the last non-traditional church I will probably ever go to (never say never, right!?). But I have told this ENTIRE story so that you, the reader, understand it was not one single church or one single group of people or even one single reason that led me to this decision. With that said, let's keep going...
I jumped in to Vineyard wholeheartedly. In the fall of 2008, I took a class called Emerge. It was a Biblical leadership training class and IT. WAS. AWESOME. It was made up of six girls and led by an amazing woman, Sally Edwards. Y'all, I cannot tell you what an experience this was. We learned so much about Bible study, Scripture memory, prayer, worship, service... the whole nine yards. And I had six awesome women to share the journey with.
If I thought Highlands was charismatic, Vineyard was like... full-out Pentecostal. (Not really, though.) These people were serious. They were thirsty for Christ, they were desperate for the Gospel, and they were intent on devoting their lives to the kingdom. I had never worshipped or prayed or studied the Bible or served so willingly before. Vineyard was a place where the Spirit of the Lord was. And where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom. (2 Corinthians 3:17). Vineyard was definitely a place of freedom for me.
When I met Blake in March 0f 2010, our love for Jesus was the very first thing we discussed. He was going to a Baptist church in Tuscaloosa. I invited him to a Prophetic Night at Vineyard and he was hesitant, but he came. We both received "words" that night and it was amazing to see Blake respond to what was told to him. He said he came expecting some sort of snakes-and-tongues type of crazy worship, but what he found was Biblical application of spiritual gifts. He started coming with me to Vineyard off and on. Then we started going to pre-engagement counseling which turned into pre-marital counseling. Blake started playing drums in the band and we started serving Vineyard together.
Things were great. We did all sorts of awesome things at Vineyard. We led worship, we worked with the kids, we led Bible studies, I did two summer internships, we organized service projects. Blake even served as the youth pastor for a while! But something was missing - community. As hard as we tried, we just couldn't find our "fit" at Vineyard. We seemed to be in a weird stage in life and there weren't many people to walk alongside us.
The first Sunday of 2011, we visited First Baptist. I just needed something different for a day and having known the McKee's, FBC was where I wanted to go. We loved Dr. McKee's message and we considered moving from Vineyard before we got married. We talked with our pastor about our concerns and were told that if what we wanted was community, we should try to make it happen. I thought that was a worthy response, so we started putting forth even more effort to get what we needed out of our church. We tried to get groups and events together and it was just an uphill battle.
Then April 27, 2011 happened. I still don't like talking about it so I will just keep this brief... God's work through Vineyard is the ONLY reason we made it through that summer. Period. There is no way we can ever repay them for their prayers, volunteers, and service to us. They took care of us during what was one of the absolute most horrible experiences I have ever been through. Oh, and we got married during this summer - our wedding was officiated by our pastors at Vineyard and it was a BEAUTIFUL ceremony!
After all of that, I didn't see how we could leave. We owed the church so much and I was being selfish for wanting more. But no matter how hard we tried to make things "happen," they just... weren't happening. And every Sunday I dragged myself out of bed, hoping that day would be different. It got to the point that in October/November, I was literally crying every Sunday before church. I didn't want to go because my heart was very broken. I started to have a lot of concerns. Not just about our lack of community, but about whether or not Vineyard (or non-traditional churches in general) was where we could really plant ourselves as a newly married couple.
So, in November, I told Blake I wanted to start searching for a new church home. Things didn't really "go down" the way I had hoped. We weren't 100% sure that we were going to go to a new church and stay or whether or not we just wanted a break. But with the way things happened, we knew we needed to move churches altogether. We didn't know where we wanted to go, all we knew is that we had a few basic requirements:
1. The church had to be a Bible-based, Bible-believing church. No wishy-washy.
2. We wanted community. A group of people in similar stages of life as us who wanted to "do life" together.
3. We wanted to go to Sunday morning small groups - aka Sunday School. (More on this in Part 3).
4. We wanted more stability, structure, and discipline.
5. I wanted to be a part of a choir.
Since we'd had such a good experience at First Baptist that January, we headed back to FBC the Sunday after Thanksgiving. I think we went back the next Sunday, too. While sitting in the back, I spotted a teacher who worked at my school with his wife (the Fessler's). And sitting near us was a couple I recognized but couldn't place (the Rockwell's). That next week, I decided to go talk to Kyle Fessler about their involvement at FBC and if they were involved in a Sunday School class. He said they were and that they were actually having a departmental Christmas party that week. Blake and I hadn't even visited the class and we decided to go to the party to meet everyone! So that week, we went to the Bentley's house and were quickly swept away by the Sewell's, the Gable's, and the Price's!!! They snatched us up and we laughed like we were old friends!!! They told us to come to their class on Sunday... so we did!
And... we kept going! We were warmly embraced into our class, we admired Dr. McKee's tenacity for Biblical based teaching, and we quickly found our "places" in the choir and orchestra. It didn't take us long to warm up to the people at First Baptist. We found exactly what we had been praying for and searching for.
In January of 2012, we started talking about joining the church. Joe Armour told me I would need to be baptised since I had not originally been baptised by immersion. This was a point of contention for me and really, it's a story that would take another three posts! I wanted to do it but I didn't want to negate my original baptism. Even though my baptism at age 15 was not by immersion, it was the "real deal" for me. But after lots of prayer and tears and discussions, I knew it was what I wanted to do. So I think we joined the church sometime in February and then I was baptised in March.
So, that's how we made it to First Baptist! A long, winding road of all sorts of pit stops and road blocks and impromptu U-turns. But the past two and a half years at a traditional, conservative Baptist church have restored my love for the Church - and maybe not quite for the reasons you suspect.
Most of you reading this know I am not necessarily a "traditional" person. While I hold conservative values and love history and tradition, I also like to question, I like to spur on change and I like to push the envelope a little. I like to challenge myself and others and I like to think beyond the black-and-white. So, you might think... if you like to be a little different, why in the world would you want to go to a traditional church? Well... that's the story for the third and final installment of this long-winded story!
Stay tuned!!!
My last post left off with me being brokenhearted in Montevallo. A two and a half year relationship was permanently over and I was two hours away from my mama.
What was I going to do? How in the world was I going to start over? Who could I turn to?
Chris and Kaley, that's who! They were still engaged and about to graduate from UM and get married. And they were there for me. That's why I love 'em! The three of us (and Matt Walker) hung out a lot that spring. And in May when the dorms closed, Kaley and I became ROOMIES again! FUN FUN FUN! That was one of the best summers. There was after-work Seinfeld watching, Tetris tournaments, lots of oldies music, and boo-hooing over Kaley's impending marriage (which meant I couldn't be her roomie anymore!). OH and did I mention I ACED Physics and Pre-Cal that summer!? Whoop whoop! (When else am I supposed to brag about that!?)
During that spring and summer, I went to Shelby Crossings some, but mostly I went home on the weekends. I loved spending time at my mom's new house. I would sit on the back porch on Saturday mornings, staring out into the pasture and just think about how much I actually liked being there. My ENTIRE LIFE, all I wanted to do was GET THE HECK OUT OF TUSCALOOSA COUNTY. But that summer, particularly, I felt myself drawn more and more to home.
Kaley & Chris got married on August 16, 2008. On the 17th, I had friends over to my mom's house in Ralph for my birthday (which is the 18th). I will never forget this conversation, which shaped the rest of my life. I was telling my friends about how miserable I was at Montevallo and how I just wanted to come home. This is what I will never forget - Matty Matt, my fake big bro, said - "There's no rule that says you have to stay in Montevallo. Just move home."
[IMAGINE A TRAIN COMING TO A SCREECHING HALT.]
Everybody agreed. They all encouraged me to just move home.
So, and I kid you not, I did. I literally moved home that week. I quit my job. I packed my stuff. I withdrew from UM, registered for classes at Shelton (it was too late to register at UA), and I moved home.
For a little while, I went to Hargrove with my mom but I didn't want it to be my home church. So I did what any 20-something would do, I asked Facebook where I should go to church. Ashley Martin (who I'd met in my first round at Shelton) invited me to Vineyard. I went one Sunday and was hooked.
It was, yet again, a non-traditional church. Casual meetings. Worship band. Hysterically funny (and gifted) pastors. A church meant for those who were fed up with religion. Now, this is where things start to get hard for me to talk about because leaving Vineyard was not a decision we entered into lightly. I have never been as invested in a church as I was in Vineyard and leaving was one of the hardest decisions I have ever made. I still love our pastors and my time there and attribute so much of my spiritual growth to the three years I spent there. I have never been in a church that is so focused on living out the Gospel day in and day out. But, this is the church we left to go to First Baptist. It was the last non-traditional church I will probably ever go to (never say never, right!?). But I have told this ENTIRE story so that you, the reader, understand it was not one single church or one single group of people or even one single reason that led me to this decision. With that said, let's keep going...
I jumped in to Vineyard wholeheartedly. In the fall of 2008, I took a class called Emerge. It was a Biblical leadership training class and IT. WAS. AWESOME. It was made up of six girls and led by an amazing woman, Sally Edwards. Y'all, I cannot tell you what an experience this was. We learned so much about Bible study, Scripture memory, prayer, worship, service... the whole nine yards. And I had six awesome women to share the journey with.
If I thought Highlands was charismatic, Vineyard was like... full-out Pentecostal. (Not really, though.) These people were serious. They were thirsty for Christ, they were desperate for the Gospel, and they were intent on devoting their lives to the kingdom. I had never worshipped or prayed or studied the Bible or served so willingly before. Vineyard was a place where the Spirit of the Lord was. And where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom. (2 Corinthians 3:17). Vineyard was definitely a place of freedom for me.
When I met Blake in March 0f 2010, our love for Jesus was the very first thing we discussed. He was going to a Baptist church in Tuscaloosa. I invited him to a Prophetic Night at Vineyard and he was hesitant, but he came. We both received "words" that night and it was amazing to see Blake respond to what was told to him. He said he came expecting some sort of snakes-and-tongues type of crazy worship, but what he found was Biblical application of spiritual gifts. He started coming with me to Vineyard off and on. Then we started going to pre-engagement counseling which turned into pre-marital counseling. Blake started playing drums in the band and we started serving Vineyard together.
Things were great. We did all sorts of awesome things at Vineyard. We led worship, we worked with the kids, we led Bible studies, I did two summer internships, we organized service projects. Blake even served as the youth pastor for a while! But something was missing - community. As hard as we tried, we just couldn't find our "fit" at Vineyard. We seemed to be in a weird stage in life and there weren't many people to walk alongside us.
The first Sunday of 2011, we visited First Baptist. I just needed something different for a day and having known the McKee's, FBC was where I wanted to go. We loved Dr. McKee's message and we considered moving from Vineyard before we got married. We talked with our pastor about our concerns and were told that if what we wanted was community, we should try to make it happen. I thought that was a worthy response, so we started putting forth even more effort to get what we needed out of our church. We tried to get groups and events together and it was just an uphill battle.
Then April 27, 2011 happened. I still don't like talking about it so I will just keep this brief... God's work through Vineyard is the ONLY reason we made it through that summer. Period. There is no way we can ever repay them for their prayers, volunteers, and service to us. They took care of us during what was one of the absolute most horrible experiences I have ever been through. Oh, and we got married during this summer - our wedding was officiated by our pastors at Vineyard and it was a BEAUTIFUL ceremony!
After all of that, I didn't see how we could leave. We owed the church so much and I was being selfish for wanting more. But no matter how hard we tried to make things "happen," they just... weren't happening. And every Sunday I dragged myself out of bed, hoping that day would be different. It got to the point that in October/November, I was literally crying every Sunday before church. I didn't want to go because my heart was very broken. I started to have a lot of concerns. Not just about our lack of community, but about whether or not Vineyard (or non-traditional churches in general) was where we could really plant ourselves as a newly married couple.
So, in November, I told Blake I wanted to start searching for a new church home. Things didn't really "go down" the way I had hoped. We weren't 100% sure that we were going to go to a new church and stay or whether or not we just wanted a break. But with the way things happened, we knew we needed to move churches altogether. We didn't know where we wanted to go, all we knew is that we had a few basic requirements:
1. The church had to be a Bible-based, Bible-believing church. No wishy-washy.
2. We wanted community. A group of people in similar stages of life as us who wanted to "do life" together.
3. We wanted to go to Sunday morning small groups - aka Sunday School. (More on this in Part 3).
4. We wanted more stability, structure, and discipline.
5. I wanted to be a part of a choir.
Since we'd had such a good experience at First Baptist that January, we headed back to FBC the Sunday after Thanksgiving. I think we went back the next Sunday, too. While sitting in the back, I spotted a teacher who worked at my school with his wife (the Fessler's). And sitting near us was a couple I recognized but couldn't place (the Rockwell's). That next week, I decided to go talk to Kyle Fessler about their involvement at FBC and if they were involved in a Sunday School class. He said they were and that they were actually having a departmental Christmas party that week. Blake and I hadn't even visited the class and we decided to go to the party to meet everyone! So that week, we went to the Bentley's house and were quickly swept away by the Sewell's, the Gable's, and the Price's!!! They snatched us up and we laughed like we were old friends!!! They told us to come to their class on Sunday... so we did!
And... we kept going! We were warmly embraced into our class, we admired Dr. McKee's tenacity for Biblical based teaching, and we quickly found our "places" in the choir and orchestra. It didn't take us long to warm up to the people at First Baptist. We found exactly what we had been praying for and searching for.
In January of 2012, we started talking about joining the church. Joe Armour told me I would need to be baptised since I had not originally been baptised by immersion. This was a point of contention for me and really, it's a story that would take another three posts! I wanted to do it but I didn't want to negate my original baptism. Even though my baptism at age 15 was not by immersion, it was the "real deal" for me. But after lots of prayer and tears and discussions, I knew it was what I wanted to do. So I think we joined the church sometime in February and then I was baptised in March.
So, that's how we made it to First Baptist! A long, winding road of all sorts of pit stops and road blocks and impromptu U-turns. But the past two and a half years at a traditional, conservative Baptist church have restored my love for the Church - and maybe not quite for the reasons you suspect.
Most of you reading this know I am not necessarily a "traditional" person. While I hold conservative values and love history and tradition, I also like to question, I like to spur on change and I like to push the envelope a little. I like to challenge myself and others and I like to think beyond the black-and-white. So, you might think... if you like to be a little different, why in the world would you want to go to a traditional church? Well... that's the story for the third and final installment of this long-winded story!
Stay tuned!!!
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